The other day, while I was talking to a good friend of mine on the phone, she said that she was upset about something. It had been several days since she called her friend, she said, and she hadn’t called her back yet.
“I’m sorry,” I told her. “Maybe she’s just too busy.”
“She always does this to me,” my friend told me.
And so I gave her this little piece of advice:
“Get new friends,” I said.
It wasn’t great advice. It was not insightful or earth-shattering.
How rarely we do this.
Like lovers, we think that friends should “just come.” They should “be led” to us, much like–well, much like nothing.
What else besides friends and lovers do we feel this way about?
When you got your job, did you just let it “come” to you? Or did you shop around? What about your favorite jeans? Were they just suddenly handed to you by fate, or did you have to weed through some piles of crap to find them?
So: my advice of the day: Shop for new friends. Meet a lot of new people and try a lot of new things. Then, when your current friends disappoint you, it won’t come as such a blow.
“It’s their loss,” you will think. And you will mean it.
And you will be able to move on.
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“I don’t know what to say other than it is the most beautiful book that I have ever read.” – Ashley
“Really, I am rather speechless.” – Sarah
“I loved the book!! I couldn’t stop reading it!! It touched me so very much.” – Haydee
“Player has given a beautiful gift to her readers. I was very touched.” – Celia
“Player’s chatty style evokes a realism and empathy for the story. One is able to feel her pain.” – Anonymous
Get What I Learned from Jane on Amazon.
More Stuff to Read:
Some Spiritual Practices Actually Work. It’s Amazing.
There are hundreds of spiritual techniques for overcoming depression and increasing inner peace. Only one blog talks about whether or not they work. With ratings. (Take that, God.)
- My Favorite Spiritual Practices for Overcoming Depression
- Depression Success Stories and Spiritual Practice Success Stories
I Suspect Inner Peace Is Just a Myth. Here Are Interviews With People Who Disagree.
Some people are such show-offs. But that doesn’t mean they’re not worth listening to.
There’s a Book for That, Too
It’s a great time to get suddenly awesome. So many teachers. So many books.
- Best Spiritual-But-Not-Religious Books for Overcoming Depression
- Books I Want My Kids to Read Someday