I saw a television show one time in which they interviewed a man who had been married for fifty years. They asked him what his secret was, and in the straighforward, no-nonsense way that cute old people often have, he said, “Don’t fight.”
I have never forgotten that advice.
A lot of relationship gurus will tell you that it’s important to fight.
I don’t agree.
It’s important to talk about things, especially your feelings, but it is my opinion that most of the time, if you’re fighting a lot, you’re with the wrong person.
Or, maybe, *you’re* the wrong person.
And you need to get right.
But if you are not the wrong person, and not doing something wrong, consistently, and not seeing it, and not acknowledging it, and not wanting to apologize for it, and you are constantly just trying to make things okay and aren’t even sure what you are fighting about . . . you’re probably with the wrong person.
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